What Was I So Afraid Of?

Well I am now a married woman and I'm thinking What was I so afraid of?  I am a 31 year old Mormon female and until now unmarried. I felt like in this Utah culture I was considered anciently old and there must be something wrong with me.  I even got told once by a Bishop that because I had many opportunities to get married,where some woman haven't had any that I would forever be a messenger angel and never make it to the Celestial Kingdom.  This statement really affected me.  I kept thinking..wait...should I have said yes to theses previous guys and gone through with the wedding??  But at the time I felt like it either wasn't the right time or the right guy for me.  I didn't want to settle and I didn't want to get married just because everyone else my age was. So I turned them down and continued down the single path of life each day feeling older and older and losing hope for my fairy tale happy ever after. Even when I did meet the right guy I wasn't prepared and had no desire for marriage. Luckily he is a VERY patient man and stuck around for years for me to see what was right in front of me.  I kept thinking back to the previous guys and thought... maybe I did blow my chance.  Maybe I was just to scared.  And maybe things would have been just fine, but I never felt peace until my current husband proposed.  I had watched as all my friends had gotten married and then started having kids.  Now most of my friends are on child number 2 or 3 and I am just barely getting started!  Ha ha I've decided when the timing is right and its God's timing also then things just come together.  I never did have the "I just knew" answer come to me like a bolt like most of my friends, but I did continue to feel peace and calm and comfort.  I just kept moving forward and praying the God would stop me if this was going to end up being a catastrophic decision.  I felt lots of interference from Satan, but still clung to that calm and peaceful feeling. I know I made the right decision even though I know life won't be all easy and perfect even now.  But the thing is, my hubby is my teammate, he is the one I feel I can be myself with and is my equal.  Someone that will work together with me on our life's trials.  I really feel like things can happen in the blink of an eye.  Many friends of mine met and married their spouse within months and they are very happy.  I think hope is key, but also living life in a way that makes you happy.  Get out and meet people.  Go to ward activities, be open to new friendships..Who know their brother could be your future spouse!  I even think online dating can be a blessing.  I have had many friends have lots of success meeting their spouse online.  Sometimes we have to wait longer for what we want, but through those trials and time spent wondering and on our knees praying,  when we finally do receive the thing we have been waiting for it is more amazing than we ever thought and we are so much more appreciative and humbled.